CONVICTION.........AND HARD WORK........AND A WILL-POWER........

Anyways, I will put in 2 hours during weekdays and 5 hours on weekends as of now........and 4 hours in weekdays and 6 hours in the weekends once the work load at IBM reduces a bit.......One year of slogging and a life time full of enjoyment.......I have shown someone a lot of dreams, a lot of promises and I simply can not turn back now......If I am a man, I will definitely stand upto them and face them, conquer them....I CAN do it....There are people who have been saying that I can not do it.....that I am doomed to do this menial job all my life....There are people who have been saying that there is simply no difference between them and me......I will show them the conviction and the strength necessary.....I will show them my mettle.....I will show them that I am different.....I will show them that I CAN and I WILL.......My MBA will definitely be not for me but for those around me.....both of whom I love and those I hate.........A lot has to be done and I will face the challenge....I am happy that I was man enough to stand up and decide to accept this challenge. Now, I have to be man enough to tread that extra mile and actually fulfill it.........The time is NOW, the person is ME and whatever has to be done, has to be done only by ME and I WILL just because I know that I CAN.........

The Conviction....

They say that in the long run. its your conviction that counts......How very true........After a long period, I finally have found my true calling.........Every day I get back from work now, I keep on saying to myself that "This job is not for me......What am I doing here????? I am neither doing anything meaningful nor am I doing something I am interested in........nor am I getting paid a hefty sum.......Then why the f**k am I here????????" The level of dedication and the mind set I have managed to achieve for the CAT and for getting into the IIMs is truly unparalleled till date......Wish I could have at least put in so much of an interest while trying to get into the IITs.........Now I realise, I deefinitely could have done it.........But its not much of a problem as such..........Life is still giving me one more chance to level things up...........To regain the ball back in my court.........To get at par or exceed my peers from whom I always felt inferior somewhere deep inside of my mind.............But I will not let that happen again............Not anymore..............And all the more, I have already shown someone a lot of dreams of a happy life, full of riches and love, comfortable, cosy and now I cannot afford to break it...........I cannot afford to bring a tear to those eyes who love me a lot.............who believe in me............The time is now and the place is here............Its me who HAS to do it.............A year of rigor for the best future I can dream for myself and I am willing to sacrifice any of my ethereal, temporary joys for it.........

First Post....

Well I have had numerous attempts at blogging and in some of the attempts, I have actually promised myself to continue this habit......but now it so happens that I have finally found some time to actually continue with this work......Have arrived at Bangalore since more than a month....a month and 9 days to be precise and life here has been a roller coaster of highs and lows here definitely........highs being a good project, good colleagues around me and all that......lows being a lot of worries regarding finding a good P.G., finally digesting the hard fact that I have to be away from all my friends, problems regarding the transfer letter and the reimbursements.......The fact that I am so far away from home and my Love have compounded to the lonliness but I guess I have no other way out.......Wish I could have an escape hatch which I could just unlock and fly away my way to freedom......Wistful thinking........sigh......Mom and Dad are visiting me the next week as has always been the case wherever I have stayed till date.....May be their transient company can offer me a much needed solace.........This job at IBM isnt all that I had ever expected..........I am hell-bent for a more than decent CAT score, a place at IIMs...............or in the worst case at XIMB although that would leave me a tad bit unhappy..........because if XIMB is to be my final stop, I could have easily cracked it in my final year itself.............Damn it, if Vivek or Jaadu or Sweta Mohanty or even worse, Satya Gaaii could clear it, then hell ya I could have easily done it........But anyways God bless them for a bright future........and may be trickle some drops of blessings towards my waiting soul too..........Help me God in achieving whatever I deserve.......Help me in keeping my parents and my Love happy.......Help me God.........